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For supporters

For friends

Being a good friend to someone LGBTQ+ isn’t complicated — it mostly looks like being a good friend, on purpose. Here’s how to show up.

If a friend comes out to you

  • Be glad they trusted you. “Thanks for telling me — I’ve got you” goes a long way.
  • Follow their lead on words, labels, and how much they want to talk.
  • Keep it to yourself. Don’t share it with others, even people you both know, unless they say it’s okay.
  • Treat them the same. They’re still your friend — keep being normal together.

Everyday ways to have their back

  • Use their name and pronouns, and back them up if others don’t.
  • Don’t make them the “spokesperson” for all LGBTQ+ people — they’re just your friend.
  • Invite them, include them, check in. Belonging beats big speeches.
  • If someone’s being cruel, a simple “not cool” or changing the subject helps more than you’d think.

If you’re worried about them

If a friend seems really down, withdrawn, or talks about not wanting to be here, take it seriously. You don’t have to fix it — listen, tell them you care, and help them reach support. You can text or call The Trevor Project together, or tell a trusted adult if they’re in danger. You being there matters more than you know.

Look after yourself too

Supporting a friend through a hard time is a lot. It’s okay to set kind boundaries and lean on your own support so you don’t carry it all alone.

Feeling overwhelmed right now?
The Trevor Project is free, confidential, and open 24/7.
Call 1-866-488-7386

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